Is Relationship Coaching Really Worth It?

Relationship coaching is a concept that many people dismiss out of hand. Unfortunately, it only takes one skeptical partner to make the job of working through a relationship harder. It's understandable why someone might not immediately buy into the idea, but you should definitely take a closer look at what relationship coaching is all about.

Process Matters

How you deal with the ups and downs of a relationship is important. Even how you deal with the middling days matters.

Lots of people think they do these things well, but they don't necessarily have a process for handling them. For example, have you really ever thought about how you and your partner argue? Is there a process for airing feelings and concerns, or do they either come out in fights or just get bottled up?

It's a big leap to think about how you address a relationship's problems, but it also is a sign of commitment. Developing a more structured approach can ensure that things don't get swept under the rug or bulldozed.

Being Heard

People need to know that their feelings matter, and that goes double when it comes to a relationship. More importantly, there needs to be some balance in how people are heard. For example, a relationship with one partner who's a really good listener and another who's a really good talker can become asymmetric even though both people feel like they're playing their roles well. Setting aside time for the good listener to talk can make a big difference in the balance of the relationships.

An Outside Opinion

Just as lawyers, doctors, and mechanics can all provide their customers with different perspectives about problems, relationship coaches can, too. Being in the middle of a situation doesn't provide a lot of perspective, especially if disputes have gotten a little too personal. Hearing what someone not party to those disputes has to say, even if you're working with relationship coaching online, can leave you with some surprising insights.

Impartiality also matters. Your coach is going to come to the situation without having a favorite. Particularly when there's an imbalance in a relationship, it doesn't hurt to have a neutral party look at things.

Continuing Guidance

Figuring out what needs to be fixed isn't enough. You have to stay the course, and knowing that your relationship coach will catch up with you about what you've been doing can provide a small but necessary nudge.

For more information, you will want to contact a professional such as Kelly Smith Author.